Five Ways to Accelerate Your Spiritual and Emotional Growth in 2022: Ruthlessly Eradicate Hurry from Your Life
/
Yep. You read that right. “Ruthlessly eradicate hurry from your life.” [1] This pithy quote is a favorite of mine from the inestimable Dallas Willard. Hurry is a towering barrier to the life God has for us. Sadly, many of us, in the words of Richard Foster, quoting Thomas Kelly, “We live so much of our lives in ‘an intolerable scramble of panting feverishness.’”[2]. Some of us are perpetually in a hurry. We might even think that hurrying is good, because in our perception, when we hurry, we can squeeze in one more thing. And isn’t that the object of life, to get more done? To accomplish more?
Well, no. It is not. We are creatures made by God to love and to be loved. Although it is exhilarating to accomplish goals as we partner with God in establishing his kingdom, our culture is way out of whack when it comes to doing vs. being. When we look at our Lord, he often stole away to a quiet place, ministered to people on the way; left when the crowd was clamoring for more. He slept soundly in a boat in the middle of a storm. He knew how to stop and rest, as well as how to do what he saw his father doing. No more. No less.
Hurry is the opposite of faith. The opposite of love. The opposite of trust. The opposite of being relational. When we hurry, anxiety builds. What if, instead of hurrying, we trusted that God knows what is supposed to happen each day and moved at his speed, in his presence? What if our interruptions were opportunities? Consider if the good Samaritan had been in a hurry? Or if Jesus had been in a hurry when he met the widow of Nain? Or if he did not stop to heal the woman with the issue of blood?
The joy of moving more slowly is often something that must be experienced to be fully grasped.
How do we begin? Dallas Willard observes that we cannot change ourselves by direct effort. In other words, it doesn’t work to scold ourselves in the moment when we are running late, Betsy, stop hurrying! Once all that adrenaline is flowing through our bodies, it is just too difficult to slow down. Instead, we practice moving more slowly, more intentionally daily—when we aren’t anxious or in a panic. We practice until rushing is no longer our default mode, and we become the kind of people who stop to help, to talk, to comfort. People who can hear God and be redirected. Who are no longer striving to squeeze in one more thing.
Here are a few practices you can start doing daily to begin slowing down. I bet you can come up with a few more. I’d love to hear your suggestions.
Start driving in the slow lane (this one from my friend, Jan Johnson).
Take walks in the woods and intentionally pause to drink in the beauty around you.
Watch the waves at the shore.
Eat slowly.
Start saying no to invitations
I believe God created us with physical limits, then put us on an earth with 24-hour days for a purpose. We want to learn to live at a peaceful pace within those limits.
If you are going to “ruthlessly eradicate hurry” from your life, it will take some planning. Here is how I do it.
I plan margins in my life. That means scheduling a 15-minute break between meetings, or a 45-minute lunch with Sam. If I put them in my calendar, I am less likely to find myself hurrying. I have time to top of my water bottle or relieve myself. To stand and stretch.
Once I have an event in my calendar, I work backwards from the start time to make sure I am allowing enough time to arrive in peace. This is what this looks like, for say, a morning hair appointment at 9:30 AM: I ask myself these questions, working backwards from the time of the appointment:
When do I want to be there? In this case 9:30 AM works.
Is parking a factor? Not usually.
What is a realistic travel time at that time of day? 30 minutes. That means I need to be backing my car out of the drive at 9:00 AM. Not getting in the car but backing it out.
What time do I need to get up to be able to move through my morning at a peaceful pace, connected to and interacting with God? I’ve timed this enough to know how much time I need. At least a full hour.
Is it a wash my hair day? If so add 30 minutes. In this specific example, my hairdresser will wash my hair, so it does not matter.
Now I know I need to get up by at least 8:00 AM, or earlier, and the time when I need to stop working, gather my stuff and leave.
Believe it or not, for me it does not stop there! I also ask:
How much sleep do I need to be rested? For me, I need nine hours. And I do not always sleep well so I have to realistically take into account moments of wakefulness in the night, so that waking at 2:45 AM does not make me anxious about getting enough sleep. I know it may sound crazy, but I will probably go to bed at 8:00 PM knowing I will be asleep by 9:00. I need that time to slow down so that I am ready to sleep. It takes far more time for me than my husband. If and when I wake up, I can intercede and enjoy the time. Do my knee stretches in the dark and be at peace. My bedtime is getting earlier and earlier as I age. That is okay. God knows my needs. If I don’t wake up in the middle of the night, I will arise rested in the early morning and can enjoy the quiet time with God or polish off a project in the quiet hours.
If it will be an early morning, I ask myself, “Are there things I can do now that will make my morning less stressful?” I often pick out my clothes and put them all on a hanger in the closet. If there are things I need to take with me, for example, my latest book as a gift to my hairdresser, I put them in my purse. There are lots of opportunities to get creative. My granddaughters put their school clothes on under their pajamas then, after breakfast, they peel off their pajamas and voilà, they are dressed for the day.
As I practice pacing myself, I revise times as I go. For example, when Sam went on oxygen, it started taking longer to get ready to go anywhere because I needed to help him. Now that we have lost our dear Darby, it is much faster in the morning because we don’t need to take him out or feed him in the morning.
If I am delayed due to unforeseen circumstances, I mentally readjust my arrival time, and, if possible, let those who I am meeting know, as soon as I know, rather than thinking I will somehow make up the lost time. It is better to face the shame of being late than to keep watching the clock with growing anxiety, saying to myself, I am late. I am late. I am late. Instead. I own it. My GPS says I am going to be ten minutes late. I face the shame, letting those I am meeting know. Instead of focusing on my lateness, I think about how much I appreciate my friend so I can arrive calm and relational.
I hope you will consider trying some of these practices. Remember, I developed these systems over time as God began calling me to slow down. I am still learning to trust that God’s timing is perfect. I encourage you, dear community, to try experimenting with one small change for a month. Discover God’s pace for your life and soak in his power to do more than we can ask or imagine. Partnering with him, moving at his pace, will open up vistas and wonders we’ve been missing in our striving to do more.
[1] Dallas Willard, Living in Christ's Presence: Final Words on Heaven and the Kingdom of God, (Downers Grove, IL., InterVarsity Press, 2014), 144
[2] Richard Foster, Prayer: Finding the Hearts True Home, (New York, HarperCollins, 1992), 93