Perhaps 23 years ago, in a season when my two youngest children were often sick, my husband Sam tore a tendon in his right middle finger. It happened like this. He spilled a cup of coffee on the cream-colored carpet in our family room, then got a dish towel and started rubbing, trying to soak it up. He rubbed so hard that his middle finger caught. He felt a sharp pain and was astonished to see that something was wrong with the last joint of his middle finger. He could grab it with his other hand, straighten it and it would pop into place but when he made a fist and it curled, it remained curled when he opened his hand. We went to the doctor and they diagnosed torn tendon or ligaments.

Sam and I have been Sabbath-keeping for at least 28 years. I know because we started when we lived in California. Although I do not remember what prompted us to begin. I know why we have continued. As we have practiced the Sabbath, we have become more and more aware of its beauty, and why Jesus said that the Sabbath was made for humans and not the other way around. Words fail me to describe how deeply Sabbath keeping has affected our lives. But let me try anyway . . .

HCI has eight Leadership Development groups that each meet once a month. The purpose of the groups is two-fold. First, to create safe, wholesome community where leaders can bond with other leaders as they share the joys and sorrows of life. Secondly, to teach and practice the skills that are essential to healthy leaders. We are learning, maturing, and growing together. Our Leader team, a small team of us who lead Leadership Development groups, are in the process of creating a four year curriculum of leadership essentials. We will meet again the first weekend in January and covet your prayers.

I have been blessed to have had many encounters with God in my life. Those experiences have made what I know about God intellectually come alive in my heart.  On Friday, November 8th I had another. Today I want to share it with you. We were holding an Immanuel Practice Day in my home. I was with two other women in my husband’s office. As we quieted I realized that I was triggered so I asked if I could receive first . . .

It is true. Sam has pneumonia, but I refuse to say again. It is not again because he is not gasping for breath, does not have a fever, can walk, is home, and is sleeping well. And although I never thought I would be grateful for mucus, it is wonderful that this time his cough is productive. And yet. And yet he is suffering another setback. Since he got out of rehab in late January, he has made remarkable strides. He went from being barely able to walk ten feet to being able to walk two miles, uphill and down. He has also fallen twice and banged his head. How are we coping? We are learning to suffer well. Here is a snapshot.

In today’s post, we will continue to look at how understanding child development—even at a rudimentary level, can help us interact with children well. Last month we looked at the needs and tasks of children aged four to 12. This month we will look at infants, from birth to age four. Most of the information I am reporting here came from three sources. 1) The book Living From the Heart Jesus Gave You has short maturity charts that are quick and easy to read. 2) Jim Wilder’s book, The Complete Guide to Living with Men, which has sadly become harder to find. 3)The work of psychiatrist Allan Schore, and 4) The Growing Child Newsletters [i] which I used in raising my own children; and 5) My own personal experience. 

I have been a prayer ministry for more than 33 years. As I have worked with thousands (guessing here!) of people, I have become aware that most of the wounds that derail our lives originate in childhood when someone we love—and want to please—expects too much from us, more than we can muster at that stage of life.

This month’s blogger is Jen Coursey who with her husband Chris run Thrive Today and the week long Thrive training program. Sam and I have done all three levels and found it life changing. The Courseys have two young boys, ages seven and nine. Jen often blogs about parenting. I love this particular blog because it demonstrates an aspect of healthy parenting that we rarely see, namely suffering with our children when we have to say no to them. One of the keys to great parenting, I believe is to empathize with what our child is feeling, while NOT GIVING IN! I hope you will enjoy this as much as I did!

I find the work of Allan N. Schore, M.D. riveting, both because he is brilliant but also because he pulls together a vast quantity of scientific literature from a wide range of fields to come up with his conclusions. This is a huge deal in the world of science. Most scientists labor away in their specific fields, which is why we find so much disagreement from one field to another. Each one is looking at a different part of the elephant!

The Happiest Baby on the Block can be your baby! When I look back on my life, one of the hardest yet most joyful seasons was when my babies were getting me up at night. The look in their eyes that said, "Mommy you are my world," delighted my heart but the sleep deprivation was brutal. One night as I paced the floor holding my sleepless baby, a horrible recurring thought kept popping into my brain: Toss her into the swimming pool. She won’t make a sound! Then you can go back to sleep! Arggghhh, I would moan as my heart beat fast with terror, Oh Lord, help me. Then it would cycle through my weary brain again . . .