Dan Van Ness has been an international leader in restorative justice for more than 37 years. Although I’ve known Dan for many years and knew that he had played an important part in Rwanda’s recovery after the 1994 genocide, I did not understand what restorative justice was or how it might help us in our nation’s current struggles with racial injustice. But I wanted to learn more. Dan sent me his book, Restoring Justice: An Introduction to Restorative Justice, now in its fifth edition, which is used as a textbook all over the world. Then we spoke in July. Here is what I learned.

Our world is full of woes. In this month’s blog I have sensed God nudging me to share a bit of my journey towards a clearer view of racism in our land. Decades ago I watched an interview with Billy Graham. Graham was asked, “What is the biggest problem in the world? His answer was “Racism.” At the time his answer startled me a bit. With all the problems in the world this was the biggest?

Most of us are aware that there is dire poverty in many parts of the world, yet during our lifetime not much has changed, making it hard to imagine that it ever will. Some multi-national corporations today command more power than many countries. Businesses operate according to Milton Friedman’s financial model, proposed in 1970, which says that business has only one social responsibility: to increase shareholder profits. In 2017 Jay Jakub, a member of our community, and his boss, Bruno Roche penned a book called Completing Capitalism: Heal Business to Heal the World that presents an alternative to Friedman’s model . . .

At the writing of this newsletter we have been under stay at home orders in Virginia for five weeks. I hear people expressing a desire to go back to “normal.” But what is normal? And do we really want to go back to it?

Perhaps 23 years ago, in a season when my two youngest children were often sick, my husband Sam tore a tendon in his right middle finger. It happened like this. He spilled a cup of coffee on the cream-colored carpet in our family room, then got a dish towel and started rubbing, trying to soak it up. He rubbed so hard that his middle finger caught. He felt a sharp pain and was astonished to see that something was wrong with the last joint of his middle finger. He could grab it with his other hand, straighten it and it would pop into place but when he made a fist and it curled, it remained curled when he opened his hand. We went to the doctor and they diagnosed torn tendon or ligaments.

Sam and I have been Sabbath-keeping for at least 28 years. I know because we started when we lived in California. Although I do not remember what prompted us to begin. I know why we have continued. As we have practiced the Sabbath, we have become more and more aware of its beauty, and why Jesus said that the Sabbath was made for humans and not the other way around. Words fail me to describe how deeply Sabbath keeping has affected our lives. But let me try anyway . . .

HCI has eight Leadership Development groups that each meet once a month. The purpose of the groups is two-fold. First, to create safe, wholesome community where leaders can bond with other leaders as they share the joys and sorrows of life. Secondly, to teach and practice the skills that are essential to healthy leaders. We are learning, maturing, and growing together. Our Leader team, a small team of us who lead Leadership Development groups, are in the process of creating a four year curriculum of leadership essentials. We will meet again the first weekend in January and covet your prayers.

I have been blessed to have had many encounters with God in my life. Those experiences have made what I know about God intellectually come alive in my heart.  On Friday, November 8th I had another. Today I want to share it with you. We were holding an Immanuel Practice Day in my home. I was with two other women in my husband’s office. As we quieted I realized that I was triggered so I asked if I could receive first . . .

It is true. Sam has pneumonia, but I refuse to say again. It is not again because he is not gasping for breath, does not have a fever, can walk, is home, and is sleeping well. And although I never thought I would be grateful for mucus, it is wonderful that this time his cough is productive. And yet. And yet he is suffering another setback. Since he got out of rehab in late January, he has made remarkable strides. He went from being barely able to walk ten feet to being able to walk two miles, uphill and down. He has also fallen twice and banged his head. How are we coping? We are learning to suffer well. Here is a snapshot.

In today’s post, we will continue to look at how understanding child development—even at a rudimentary level, can help us interact with children well. Last month we looked at the needs and tasks of children aged four to 12. This month we will look at infants, from birth to age four. Most of the information I am reporting here came from three sources. 1) The book Living From the Heart Jesus Gave You has short maturity charts that are quick and easy to read. 2) Jim Wilder’s book, The Complete Guide to Living with Men, which has sadly become harder to find. 3)The work of psychiatrist Allan Schore, and 4) The Growing Child Newsletters [i] which I used in raising my own children; and 5) My own personal experience.